why won't i get stressed up? of course i will, right?

WHAT WAS THAT ALL ABOUT?!?!
maybe whatever you told me was because you know you'd feel bad if you don't. hmmmmm. i know. its been a very fast ride. there had been series of forced emotion. but then again, why start it in the first place? sleep on it.

about me you don't have to worry. ill get by like i always do. never say never.

lemme guess wattaya doing now?
i know i won't like it one bit.

i have a 1001 nice things to think abou but i'm still stuck at the un-nice things. optimistic ella, optimistic! if my train of thoughts are gonna be forever in this way, i'll die a grumpy unmarried old woman or maybe get married, but to an equally looser man. maybe even a screw loose. but whats life without its miseries anyway. get used to it! i already am.-_- but talking about it makes me feel better. then would i stop boring people with my sob stories(that i bring upon myself?) when i meet them. ELLA SO CLEVER!

am i fierce? NO, I'M NOT! i only talked sense. i think it must have gotten into her tts why she cried. wallau! i'm sweet, kind and many more good things okayyyy. HAHAHAHHA. because i think giving back and forth attitudes to minahrep minahrep kecil is so beneath me.

now the feeling totally sucked!